The Coolhunter.

When did it become such a sport to be cool? I know there has always been this need to have the best stuff and everything, but lately people have become so bitter and angry over clothes and shoes and other random bits of crap.

Yes, I am talking about YOU girls and boys with artistically ripped jeans, op-shop jumpers, brogues and 'vintage' purses. The chicks that glare at me in the salvos through coloured ray bans and power through the markets in lace-up boots and floral dresses. YOU WERE NOT THE FIRST. Why all the hostility? It's like, everyone has all of a sudden decided to claim that 'vintage' has always been their style, that they have shopped at the oppy since they were, like, 5. 

And perhaps every single person who reads this will nod in agreement without realising that they too have fallen into this trap. It's just clothes. Seriously. Why does there have to be this mad rage if someone buys a nice dress from vinnies? Why does everyone say 'oh everybody shops at op shops now,' as if they were the first. You were not the first. You were not. Jesus. 

I can hardly stand to be in Byron at the moment. On the weekends, the streets are full of tourists who have tried to 'embrace the lifestyle' by piling on bangles and a colourful sarong, not washing their hair for a week and walking barefoot down the road. Do I need to point out that you can pick the locals in jeans and beanies?

 But they come in swarms, these girls and boys with lookbook as their bible and an attitude to rival Anna Wintour, and they are positive that they alone started the vintage trend, they were the first to buy recycled clothing and now that YOU have dared to copy their oh so personal style you only deserve to be glared at. 

Well, screw you all. I have spent all week in my dressing gown and I love it.